My wife is furious with me for reporting my head of department’s affair with married teacher
DEAR DEIDRE: MY head of department has been sneaking around with another teacher in his team.
They have been so indiscreet, I felt I had no choice but to tell the head.
The problem is, my wife also teaches at the same place and she’s furious with me for reporting them.
I’m a 41-year-old man and my wife, also 41, works with the head of department.
She is angry that if these two teachers get suspended or even sacked it will mean more work for her.
We teach in a sixth form college and I can’t be the only one to have noticed their unsubtle behaviour.
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Both of these teachers are married but that doesn’t stop them disappearing together at lunchtimes to secluded parts of the building.
They regularly “work together” in an office which conveniently has a large sofa behind the door, and no windows.
Every time I think about what might be happening, it eats away at me.
I need someone neutral to tell me if I was right to speak out.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: While you don’t know for certain that they are having an affair, where senior staff hold responsibility over more junior colleagues this can increase the risk of favouritism, conflicts of interest and abuse of trust.
Don’t assume you are the only one to have noticed. You did what you thought was right.
If other staff or pupils might also have noticed, their relationship could be very damaging for the college.
Many organisations have a ban on workplace relationships because of the damaging effect it can have.
Extra-marital affairs invariably lead to gossip and lower staff morale, so naturally it’s a controversial issue.
As inconvenient as it might be for your wife, you’ve done the right thing.
Your colleagues need to be warned their behaviour is unprofessional.
